i feel bad for my parents that i’m their daughter. i think every parent hopes their child will be happy and successful. i’m looking at old pictures of all of us together when i was little and i feel guilty for being a failure to them. they have done everything and given me everything to be happy but for some reason i am still miserable.i think my dad looks at me sometimes and wonders why i can’t be like him when he was my age and why i am the way i am. i feel like i fight against being happy and that scares of me because i don’t mean to do it. i’m at a point where i literally have pushed everyone out of my life including my parents. i think they’ve give up on me and i’ve given up on myself so i guess i just have to wait and see what happens. i’ve pretty much accepted it won’t get better and i can honestly say i am not upset,it’s almost a relief.